The Lego Wars

Published Date: June 3rd, 2011
Category: Weekly Thought

Most people work to provide their families food and a roof over their heads. Others are just working for the weekend. And then there’s me. I’m working for Legos.

Yep, Legos. At least that is what my son thinks.

Like most 6-year-old boys, he is obsessed with Legos. It turns out, you can NEVER have too many Legos. Regardless if you have FOUR BINS of them, that is not enough. Not only are FOUR BINS not enough, you CANNOT:

1)      Throw away any of the boxes the Legos come in. They, of course, are needed as reference points as to how the Legos should look.

2)      Take apart any of the Lego worlds your son has created. If he makes the “Lego City Airport” or the “Lego City Submarine,” it must stay intact. Which means that your entire house is like this creepy Lego museum.

3)      Loose any of the Lego instructions that come with the Lego kits. These little pamphlets (which are pretty much 2 pages of instructions and then EIGHT pages of other Lego kits your son or daughter MUST have IMMEDIATELY, therefore pretty much making them like Lego porn for your kids) must go into a special Lego binder that is on hand at all times.

If you do any of the above things, you are chastised and accused of “breaking my Legos!” or “losing my Legos!” for hours on end. Which is tiring, especially after you have been nursing your aching foot all day that you bruised since you stepped on what? Legos.

Lately my son’s newest Lego obsession is the Star Wars “Death Star” Lego set. Which retails for $400. Which he thinks he should have RIGHT NOW. When I explained to him that $400 was a lot of money to spend on Legos and that it would take me an entire day of working to pay for this ridiculous purchase he responded without batting an eye:

“Well, on days that I take Spanish I get to school even EARLIER, so you can start then. You’ll have plenty of time to work that day.”

To which I responded with:

“Or you could just sell A LOT of lemonade. I would get started on that if I were you.”

Oh Legos. You are the bane of my existence. Yet someday while my son is 18 and skulking around the house in weird skinny jeans and tight black t-shirts, I know I will wish for these days of The Lego Wars. Until then, I’ll gingerly step around my house, silently planning my next move against the Legos…

This entry was posted on Friday, June 3rd, 2011 at 9:53 am and is filed under Weekly Thought. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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