Did you Say “Landscaping” or…

Published Date: May 24th, 2011
Category: Weekly Thought

So it really wasn’t a word I wanted to teach my son. At age 6. But like most things you don’t want your child to do/know/understand/feel at a young age, teaching him the word “manscaping” was an accident.

It was an ordinary Monday morning. We were all rushing around, getting ready for work and school, running late even though NOTHING had changed about what times we needed to be at work and school in the morning. G was in his room pretending to get dressed, but really just laying on pillows and staring at his new moon light, I was brushing my teeth, and John was taking a shower when let’s just say the concept of “manscaping” came up in our conversation.

And then G jumped out of his reverie like he had just heard “free Happy Meals for all boys under 7” or “all little boys deserve ONE Transformer a day” and bounded into the bathroom. I must share this uncomfortable conversation, because all parents should be prepared when the concept of manscaping comes up. Because it will.

G: Manscaping? Manscaping? Is that like landscaping? What’s manscaping?

Me: Silence. And then huge guffaws. And then one of my famous ‘what did you just ask’ questions?’ flew out of my mouth.

G: I asked you what manscaping is.

Me: Now silently doubled over in laughter. I am doubled over in laughter as I write this now.

John: Hissing at me from the shower ‘stop laughing. You’re making this worse.’

Me: Which of course made me laugh so hard, I actually had tears streaming down my face.

And a minute had now gone by. Instead of a boring answer to what manscaping is, G is now egged on by my incessant, loud laughter and thinks he is REALLY funny.

And proceeds to make up the “Manscaping Song.” That goes something like this:

“Manscaping (soft), manscaping (little louder), Manscaping (even louder), MANSCAPING (yelling), I love man…scap…ing!”*

I physically now had to go to a different floor of the house I was laughing so hard.

And for those of you wondering, we never gave him an answer. We pulled the infamous parental tool of answering an uncomfortable question with a question (i.e., ‘Mom, where do babies come from?’ And the Mom answers, ‘Where do YOU think babies come from, sweetheart?’).

His answer?

“Manscaping is landscaping done by a man.”

Exactly.

*The release date for this single is TBD…

This entry was posted on Tuesday, May 24th, 2011 at 6:52 am and is filed under Weekly Thought. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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