Dish Towel Optional

Published Date: February 10th, 2011
Category: Weekly Thought


I couldn’t help myself. I just had to buy my son a $26 dress shirt and a $16 silk tie.

Come on—the kid only has his kindergarten graduation pictures once.

Regardless, I did realize the ridiculousness as he stood in the mirror and looked back at me and was pretty much a small version of my husband. Can I help it that I wanted him to look rich? That I wanted him to look professional? At age 6?

Well, between his baby blue sateen, Calvin Klein button-down shirt to his black, 100% silk tie, he looked all of the above. And then I proceeded to be a total freaky, Beauty Queen Pageant mom as I wrapped a dish towel around his neck as he ate breakfast, combed his hair TWICE before his pictures, and then made him take it all off after his pictures, so he wouldn’t ruin his fancy duds at school.

And during all of this craziness all I could think of was,

“Really, Serena? For one silly picture that we probably won’t even hang up, since we haven’t hung up any of his other school pictures for the last three years? The school pictures that I have proceeded to lose?”

But for a few brief minutes in time, I got those crazy moms. Those moms who wouldn’t bat a tiny eyelash at buying their children a silk tie, since they are buying their 5-year-old daughters $1000 worth of make-up every year. It is such a domino effect—the pictures lead to the nice dress shirt which of course had to be followed up with a snazzy tie.

Meanwhile, half of his little guy friends were just in their nicely pressed, Target button-down shirts, and they looked just fine. Why I couldn’t do that, I don’t know. Maybe it is the old child model in me.

Now I will obviously have to find numerous places for my son to wear his $50 worth of dress clothes. Easter is a definite, of course. I am hoping he has to dress up again for his actual kindergarten graduation. And then there are a slew of park district Valentine’s Day dances we are going to this weekend that I might recommend are “black tie optional.” If you hit any of them, just look for him. He’ll be the exquisitely dressed kid with the dish towel around his neck…

This entry was posted on Thursday, February 10th, 2011 at 9:12 am and is filed under Weekly Thought. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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